Remembering Grandma Mary today

Today is the one year anniversary of my mother's death.  I am not only grateful that I was blessed to have her in my life for so many years, I am also grateful that our children all knew her well.

Bonny was her first grandchild - and she came when she was born - and they always had a special bond.

 

Harry got spend lots of time with her too, and she loved having him visit with his family.

 

Phoebe had some fun adventures with her grandma - and Mother loved hearing about her adventures as she grew.

 

Eliza was shy and withdrawn around most adults, but she grew out of that and loved being with her Grandma Mary.

 

Hannah and Mom had some sewing adventures together - and Mom never forgot them!!

 

Mom used to say that she could tell Noah whatever she wanted to - and she could - and he loved her all the more for her honesty.

I am also grateful that so many of my own grandchildren knew her too - I never knew a great-grandma - it's a special blessing.

The anniversaries of her passing will pile up - but there will always be memories to cherish.

Happy 100th Robert Clayton!!

Today would be my dad's 100th birthday.  He is shown here in 1945, holding me.  He always held the babies - if he were alive today, they'd probably call him "The Baby Whisperer!"

 

My dad always read the newspaper.  He read the scriptures and the newspaper - we took two for many years - a morning paper and an evening paper. I think I learned to love reading the newspaper from him.

 

My mom and dad after they were engaged.  My dad always wore suspenders!

 

The way I remember my mom and dad best - they always like to sit together.

 

My dad watering the lawn - he always had someone else do the mowing and raking - I guess that's what you can do when you have 6 sons!

 

As a kid, I thought my dad was always at the shop.  And he always wore a shop apron too.

 

My dad was always a family man!

My dad would probably have loved living to 100.  He always liked to say that two important things happened on November 7th, 1916 - Bob Clayton was born and Woodrow Wilson was elected President of the United States.

Happy Birthday Dad!! Maybe you and Mom are having a little celebration.  I would always like to think that!

The Way Things are These Days!

My mother has always been a major part of my life.  Even when I lived away from California, I was in regular contact with her.  We've been back here in California for over 37 years now, and our lives have entwined pretty regularly.  

The above photo was taken on her 90th birthday.  We have gathered over the years for visits, Clayton Family Reunions, baptisms, baby blessings, weddings, funerals, and birthdays.  Starting a few months ago, I have come on Mondays and Tuesdays to spend time with her and to allow Donna to go and do things she wanted and needed to do.  

I am certainly glad I started doing this, because I have gained a lot from the experience - gained knowledge and insight that is already serving me well.  For starters, I began asking mother questions about her life and wrote down the answers.   I have a little treasure trove of memories at my fingertips now!

Right now Joan is in Chile and Alice is in Korea.  But Donna, Mary, Leslie, and I have been working together to provide the care and assistance that Mother needs now. The recent realization that what we thought was arthritis is actually a possible cancer that is eating away at the bones in her neck has necessitated some significant changes.  

Little by little we are taking care of details - palliative care, dependable care-givers, support needs - and thankfully all 12 of us are on board and supporting one another.

But sometimes when I think about it, and think about the inevitable, I am sad.  Not because I lack faith.  And not because I don't know that there is a plan of happiness.  And not because I don't believe in forever families. But I am sad because a chapter is ending. I am sad because I can't take away the pain and discomfort. I am sad because time is marching on  - truly marching on  - and we cannot call it back!

Fortunately life marches on too - and we can move forward with it!

A special day for a special woman!!

I am fortunate to have 5 wonderful sisters - and one of them is Donna - and today is her special day!!  I recall the day she was born.  I continue to take credit for her name - the story goes - and it's me telling it - that when we asked Dad what the new baby's name would be, he said they hadn't decided.  So I suggested Donna Jean - because my best friend's older sister was named Donna Jean - and I thought she was very cool.  So I assumed the name was very cool too - and it has stood the test of time!!

Have a great day Donna - and a wonderful year ahead - we love you!!

At the end of the day -

So, it's been a long day.  Started out with a facial - I love those!!  Then came home to a couple of projects that I did complete - always a good feeling with that.  Then off to the grocery store for the fixings for a barbecue with Charlie, Jeanette, Donna, and Mom.  Then a very fun evening of eating and visiting and laughing and enjoying one another's company.

And the recognition that I did not take one photograph - or serve dessert!